hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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