after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Randomize
