One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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