I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
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