im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
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