I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
