I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
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