I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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