his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
