he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
