just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize