And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize
