Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
Only a mothe r could love this liver
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
two words...techno handjob
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
