I must be too annoying 4 u.
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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