you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
Randomize
