We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize
