ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
