the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
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