my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
Did you just see the Batmobile???
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Randomize
