I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
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I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
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she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize
