you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Randomize
