Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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