It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
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