it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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