I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Randomize