Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
