you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Randomize
