Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
