Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2