Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
