I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
