We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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