i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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