THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Randomize
