so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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