life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize