She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
These Attractive Criminals Took Sexy Mugshots That Made Them Famous
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.