I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize