I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
