Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
