we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
