i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
