What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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