D3 body, D1 cock
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
even my farts smell like vagina
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
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