First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
