I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
