im drinking this country out of the recession.
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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