i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
