i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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