well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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